either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
