I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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