At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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