This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
