butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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