can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize