Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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