i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
