You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
