I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
