he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
