i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
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