ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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