Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
