no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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