I got chris browned last night
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
