Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
