I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize