I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize