from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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