No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
My penis needs a shock collar
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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