Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
