Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
