How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
