And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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