Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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