i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize