well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
