You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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