It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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