nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
