I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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