I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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