She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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