Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
