...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I just sucked dick on a ferry
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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