exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
