I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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