Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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