apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
my poor anus
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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