I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
