Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I have fence marks all over my body
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
