You really coming over, don't trick.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
