Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize