in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
