bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
