At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
