you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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