she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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