if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
