It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
